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Hal's Column
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Saturday, June 07, 2008, 3:00 AM
Graduation Day: Don't miss it By Hal Tarleton | Opinion Editor Wilson County's three high schools graduate their seniors today. Over the past few weeks, graduates have been crossing the podium at colleges and universities around the state and nation. I'd like to say that I remember it well, but I don't. Thirty-seven years ago this month, I followed the trendy path and decided to forgo graduation. I had earned my degree; it was not a case of failure of achievement, only a failure of judgment on my part. It was only a couple of years past the 1960s, and the worst excesses of the 1970s (think: disco music) had not yet arrived. But the worst of the 1960s were still with us -- the anti-establishment contrarianism, the snobbery of youthful certitude, the arrogance of youth. We wore our hair long, our jeans patched and our politics on our sleeves. "Never trust anyone over 30" would certainly have covered anyone chosen to speak to the Class of 1971. We also didn't trust ceremony. Weddings of the day (but not mine, fortunately) took free-form shapes. Couples proudly proclaimed they wrote their own vows. And many couples simply skipped that wedding ceremony part altogether and went straight to the honeymoon. Likewise, many of my class skipped the graduation ceremony, the regalia of cap and gown, the commencement speech and the march across the stage. It was just a meaningless ceremony, I told my parents. The university will mail me my diploma, I said, which it did. I was right about that. But I was wrong about the rest. Ceremonies are not meaningless. They are milestones that have been created and evolved over generations as markers of achievement and symbols of importance. Graduations, weddings, funerals -- all these ceremonies serve a purpose, even though they might not be essential to education, love or death. They provide focal points for pride, emblems of commitment and comfort for grief. Having attended high school and college graduations for my own children now, I understand what I did in skipping graduation: I denied my parents the joy of seeing their son take part in a symbol of achievement -- his own but also theirs. I denied them the satisfaction of seeing their son do what they had not been able to do -- receive a college degree. Until you've been on the parental side of this divide, you don't fully appreciate how much little achievements mean, whether it's the first step, the first day of school or that graduation walk. So I would advise today's graduates to take pride in their day of honor but also give the honor to the parents who set them on the path that led to the walk across the stage. Forty years later you won't regret it. tarleton@wilsontimes.com | 265-7812
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